Random #407

Anybody else forget that Periscope is not Facetime? I have not logged on many times because I didn’t like that way I “looked”. OR, when I am on, I start responding like it’s a one on one conversation instead of a ‘scope session…

Random #406

Wanna know what’s fun? Sitting in a math class, in which your brain is truly smoking, and a whole bunch of skinny freshman…mostly in shape football players, are complaining about the 5 lbs they gained. And they look skinny and in shape…


In the summer, when you are riding through the hood, you smell real, authentic, charcoal bbq.

When you are riding through the burbs you smell gas bbq.

There is a huge difference…

Happy Labor Day!

Random #404

Also, I saw something yesterday that said, only in America do we make the sick walk to the BACK of the store to get their prescriptions/meds but keep the cigarettes at the front of the store.


Random #403

Only we in America would get excited about food trucks! First of all, the Hot Tamale man been doing food trucks since 1902. Secondly, I’m paying a restaurant to stand in a line outside in the heat, wait in the heat while he prepares it (IN A TRUCK) then go scavenger hunt a place to sit somewhere and eat it?! Why?

Random #401

I stopped in Speedway this morning for coffee. (I’m out of k-cups, I don’t know how I ever let dumb stuff like this happen, but there it be, so….). I always grab a doughnut bag and fill it with splenda and french vanilla cream cups. To Speedway worker’s dismay. I can feel them watch me as I do this. They whisper to each other and sigh and roll their eyes. And I could care less. I give them the biggest smile and cheeriest hello. 1. I’m not stealing 2. How do they know how much cream and splenda I need? 3. WHY DO SERVICE PEOPLE ACT LIKE IT”S COMING OUT OF THEIR POCKET?! (Do not even get me started on Chipotle and extra cheese!)
Anyway, I go to the counter and check out. As she is ringing up my stuff, a lady in scrubs and a very bad synthetic wig walks up to the counter, stands next to me, and slams two Colt 45 cans and a bottle of vodka down on the counter (mind you, it ain’t her turn yet! Why is she standing NEXT to me and not BEHIND me?).  The three main things I wanted to ask her was 1. What time was she gonna get the party started, because it was 7:30 am 2. She had on scrubs. Was she in the medical field and was she headed to work? 3. Did she want me to pray for her? She seemed so angry, I didn’t say anything. I did whisper a pray for her, though.
As I was leaving, she started yelling about cigarettes. I looked back at the cashier and smiled again. A bag full of splenda doesn’t seem so bad compared to a drunk nurse who wants her squares…

Random #399

Had a conversation with the oldest love muffin. He asked me why do I make he and his brother watch movies like Selma (not for nothing, this was his attempt at making conversations while waiting to get immunization shots at the doctor. Theory states he asked a sad question, to disguise his fear. But I digress). So I answered him, saying he needed to be aware of his history.
Him: But it makes me sad
Me: SO imagine how THEY must feel, the ones that actually went through that awful time
Him: Yeah
Me: They went through that for you! So you could go to any school you wanted to. So you could get a great education. So you could vote. So you could go to the library. So you could sit in any restaurant. So you…
I stopped and got just as sad as he was.. I was going to say so you could be treated like every other person. So you wouldn’t be stopped by police just because you’re black.
It’s sad that 2015, sometimes feel like the ’60s…